Keeping abreast of developments in Facebook row

Despite all the awful in the world, at least Facebook exercised some sense this week. Hope for all.

The petition which followed Facebook's announcement banning breastfeeding pics is an unfortunate side-effect of progress.

Eds note: I do love women.

Anticipating Che

Benicio del Toro and Steven Soderbergh's eight-year labour of intrigue into Cuban revolutionary icon Che Guevara finally hits UK shores on the 2nd January, thankfully giving me a day to shake off the inevitable New Years' hangover so I can approach the multi-hour bio-pic with a clear, objective head.

The film, entitled simply Che, has been split into two parts, which were initially to be called The Argentine and Guerilla, but are now just Part One and Part Two, and by all accounts will be nothing if not a very unique take on both the revolutionary subject and the biopic genre. Needless to say, the film will divide audiences.

Most critics who've seen the pre-release screenings say it's the overwhlemingly didadict (some say dispassionate/ unconventional) approach Soderberg has taken with Che which has really got people pigeon-necking [1], [2], [3], [4]. Opinion is divided.

Little White Lies' Jonathan Crocker said "it had the look and feel of a seminal film...as with any cinematic landmark, it may take years to fully absorb." Roger Ebert named it as one of his films of 2008, whilst James Rocchi of cinematical.com went a step further and named it as his film of the year. On the flipside, Variety film critic Todd McCarthy called it "non-dramatic" and that "[n]either [Part One or Two] feels remotely like a satisfying stand-alone film, while the whole offers far too many aggravations for it's paltry rewards."

So, no pressure for Che to perform at the box-office then.

As a political entity, Che has made waves as well. Miami Cubans protested at a screening near a US screening in Little Havana (despite many not having seen the film), Soderberg had to deal with rowdy invitees and a marathan Q&A session in New York and del Toro has received praise from Cuban national newspaper Granma, a Cannes Best Actor win and a letter of approval from Guevarra's wife.

I'll report back on here with a full review in January, but until then, enjoy a trailer. (Might be a Youtube special, might be the official one, not entirely sure.)

Telegraph row with Greenslade, get blog-post kicking

About a week ago there was an interesting little blog feud/debate between Media Guardian critic/all round journalismystro Roy Greenslade and The Telegraph honcho Justin Williams over goings on at the Telegraph.

You might be wondering I've decided to bring this up now. The reason is not so much about the feud, although that was good, but because of the feedback left on Williams blog since. He's had his face metaphorically rubbed over a dirtdee washing-filled floor, by almost all the posters. Can it really be that bad at the rebranded-Torygraph?

I'd like to think not, simply because the editor, Will Lewis, is City Uni journalism alumni and if he's tarred then the rest of us (probably) are too. Although, as I'm unlikely to ever make a huge difference to the mainstream British press, maybe I shouldn't care.

Anyways, back to the story. Greenslade, who lectures a bunch of us trainee journalists every term-time Monday afternoon at City University, is concerned the Telegraph is becoming an evil enterprise which lays off staff, systematically breaks journalists' morale and is trying to become the new Daily Mail - "unashamedly popularist," says the Green man.

He left a post after the said blog in which he braced himself for the Williams shizen to really hit the fan, but maybe secretly goading the Telegraph deputy ed to really let loose. Which he did.

Cue mud-slinging, anger, vitriol etc. and an interesting debate on the future of print journalism and how journalists should do their jobs in the UK.

Iraqi journo gives Bush the boot

Normally, George Bush doesn't need any help to put his foot in it. However, at a news conference in Iraq today he was introduced to the sole of journalist Muntadar al-Zeidi's shoe as a thank-you for all of his good work building a new American oil base, er..., future for the country.

In Arabic culture to show someone the sole of your foot is the something like the equivalent of calling some a c**t in Britain. Hmmm...

Eds note - I will learn how to upload video to this blog asap.

Update 17th December 2008 - If it appeared Bush was just a little too good at ducking from those shoes, the reason is now clear, as shown in the footage below. He's been taking lessons from the Matrix Trilogy. So we now also know what he actually does all day. In addition, to feed your inner child, play Sock and Awe, Flying Babush or Bush Boot Camp.

Not funny, Elton? Guardian wins landmark court case against singer

Elton John likes to throw tantrums that most newborns would be proud of. Unfortunately, he'll have to cry into his pillow alone over his latest spat after a judge ruled the Guardian had not defamed or libelled the moody singer in a spoof article about his annual White Tie and Tiara Ball.

Guardian writer Martina Hyde wrote the piece, which is essentially a mock diary of Elton's week as he prepares for his AIDS charity ball. The article has Reg Dw..., sorry, Elton seeing the ball as less a chance to raise money for research and more a chance for him to reseach which attending celebs would be useful to be seen with for the next twelve months. Any cash heading for his foundation would be subject to costs, which Hyde has Elton amusingly named 'care-o-nomics'.

The decision is a great one to me, professionally and personally. As a writer it's good too know that the law agrees we're allowed to prod at the celeb piggies for a bit of fun, just to remind them that their egos aren't universally appreciated by all. Elton John needs goading, if only to ensure he continues to have a hissy fit everytime he gives someone enough ammunition to wind him up. Which is all the time.

Legally, journalists have been vindicated by this decision, which was hailed as a "landmark decision" by Guardian writer Duncan Campbell.

The former Watford chairman will now be out of a substantial amount of cash (which he would have otherwise payed into his charity, of course) for legal fees for both himself and the Guardian.

As a human being, it's also good to know that freedom of speech has been protected; I was starting to get the impression celebs have immunity from all laws normal people are subject to. I was starting to think I might have to apply for a spot on next year's X-Factor or throw an egg at Boris Johnson at his next public appearance just to get some press exposure. I'd then become a Z-Lister for a few weeks, enabling myself to do some really bad journalism and get away with it on grounds that I'm too important to be bothered by some silly editor... he's not as famous as me and therefore bypasses the radar.

So, Elton, take the decision on the chin. We're awaiting your next tantrum with some very tickly feathers.

Flat Earth News: Journalists - do not read

I've just had one of the most exhausting few weeks of my life. Fellow journalism students at City might think I'm referencing the massive workload we've had (two reporting port-folios due on the same day is enough to crush the strongest of spirits) but I'm not.

My exhaustion is self-inflicted and on-going. I'm reading a book. A book about journalism. A book about journalism by a journalist who thinks journalists are no longer doing journalism. No no, instead, they do 'churnalism'. This basically means they are expected to write up to ten stories a day by evil editors who will chop off their hands, Saudi-style, if they don't hit their target. It means they rely on Press Association press releases to write those ten stories and that they often have neither the time nor the talent to check the facts of those ten stories because the deadline means deadline or, like a former editor told me recently, "only doesn't mean deadline if you're dead, a family member's dead [questionable excuse] or you're unconscious [does being drunk/hungover count?]." It sounds really, really crap.

As someone spending a goddawful amount of money to be training as a journalist, I should have immediately burned this book, Flat Earth News by veteran hack Nick Davies, on sight. And other journalism trainees should have done the same - what's a few Waterstones up in flames if the alternative it is to have our souls smashed to shit by seasoned journalists who know too much?

In all honesty, most of Flat Earth News is probably spot on but I don't want to know that. Leave me to be idealistic and naive, or at least let me learn the truth in my own time. I start a month's work experience at two magazines tomorrow and by Nick Davies assertion, that must make me a idiot, a fool, all of the above or just a glutton for lies, the lying liars that tell lies and the lying media that lets those lying liars lie.

Down with Davies and his insider knowledge. Up with the liars.

A depressingly good selection of cinema

Recent cinema releases include Zack and Miri Make a Porno and My Best Friend's Girl, which are unashamedly stupid duder comedies. Adding High School Musical 3 to that list completes the three feel-good films in the UK movie chart top 10.

Besides them, EVERYTHING out at the moment will make you think about killing yourself. Quantum of Solace (currently the UKs number 1) deals with Daniel Craig's new moody Bond. Body of Lies is all about, well, lies and the lying liars that tell them. Max Payne is a noir about a renegade cop trying to find out who murdered his wife and kid. All pretty depressing.

However, three other films currently on general release at the minute make the said films pale in the sad stakes. They will crush your spirit whilst being really damn watchable, annoyingly amongst the best films of the year. Hunger, rookie director Steve McQueen's debut, is an unflinchingly bleak look at legendary IRA member Bobby Sands who died after hunger-striking for 66 days. It's a really good film - poignant but not preachy.

Gomorrah - about the Italian Comorrah mafia who run most of Naples - will kill any nostalgic memories you have about the gangsters in Goodfellas and The Godfather. The Comorrah are anything but goodfellas - instead they're fat, petty and reckless and have no allegiance to rules and respect. Women and children are targets, as are morons and the weak. Gomorrah is nearly three hours of the starkest, toughest look at gangsterism ever put to celluloid. You'll NEVER watch The Godfather in the same way again after seeing it. Or Scarface. (You'll understand why.)

If anything could have been more depressing but at the same time brilliant, then it's Waltz With Bashir, which probably pips the others to Depresser of the Week. God, it's soul-crushing. Visually beautiful, expertly pieced together and just totally horrible. And without giving too much away, the film's final message is just about the saddest thing you'll ever see in a cinema: The human race is incapable of progress, even when armed with the most pertinent and harrowing memories.

See them, don't see them, just be sure your mental state is in a good place before you take the plunge if you decide to do so. Otherwise, it's pretty horrorific stuff. Be warned... all three are about as good as cinema will get in 2008.

When the monks went to war...

Greatest. Footage. Ever.

Yesterday in Isreal these monks confused the ideology of peace with the philosophy of 'You want a piece of this!?!' more often associated with Friday nights in Hammersmith than the Old City's Church of the Holy Sepulchre.

If religion was always like this, I'd convert.

Republicans get a McCaining as hope returns to the world

Here is the number crunch of Barack Obama's historic election victory last week, according to CNN figures.

Only Missouri is yet to declare a result, although McCain is likely to have just sneaked it.

Essentially the election was over when it was announced early on that Pennyslvania had gone Obama's way (55%-44%). Analysts immediately (and correctly) called the result and with news that Florida was turning bluer by the second, a Democrat win was beyond doubt. McCain very graciously conceded defeat soon after.

The figures show the Democrats gaining roughly 53% of the vote to the Republicans 46%.

As naive as it sounds, Obama's win has given the world a new hope that America can go some way to rescuing it's international relationship and even make some positive progress on the workd stage - certainly people will not be expecting any more ill-advised wars in the Middle-East. With huge majorities in the Senate and Congress, President-elect Obama will have at least two years to really push his policies before the next round of House elections in 2010/11.

Of course, the big story is the obvious one: A black man and his family will move in to the White House on the 20th January 2009. A true American redemption story has come to it's dramatic climax with racial barriers which can never be put back up smashed down. The hope is that the end of Bush-house Republica signals a new era in world politics with a potentially great leader at the helm.

Storm-in-a-teacup #2: Brooker breaks down Daily Mail morons

Very quick post, just highlighting a very-well worded version of my opinions on the great Radio 2 Wussy/Wossy scandal.

Charlie Brooker at his best.

Obamccain the finale: America goes to the polls, Democrats tipped for win

Voting has begun in the States to a backdrop of pollsters and bookies heavily backing an Obama victory despite the election being the first to feature a black candidate.

Obama victory parties are springing up across the world, despite that voting doesn't close in most places until much later tonight. Such is the desire for an Obama Whitehouse that US police are preparing for riots if McCain somehow comes through. Obama himself has remain stoical and said just one word on today's event to a raucious rally in Virginia: "Tomorrow."

The Democratic candidate is fully aware there are issues involved in this election which have never needed be factored in before, and the main one of those is race. Many still believe a black man cannot win the Whitehouse [check any comments page on any Obama related news story] and attitudes like Pat Buchanan's here don't help. A New York poster ad which has taken-off in the last few days aims to knock the debate dead (at least in the city - if it is even an issue there).



It's a very good message and a great piece of Photoshopping by a little politico somewhere. It would have been a very different election if the roles were reversed but with luck the US people have finally done something worthy and voted on the policies, not the colour.

US Election day beckons: Obama should "put some meat on his ideas", says Conan The Barbarian

Tomorrow night America goes to the polls, with Barack Obama taking a clear lead into the voting. However, as we all know, this has been one of the most unpredictable campaigns in modern political history and any number of factors could decide the result: race, rednecks voting Democrat, a plumber named Joe or a moron from Alaska who can't name a daily.

However, as much as I want you to win, Mr Obama, all-action meathead Arnold Schwarzenegger has a message. You should listen, mainly because it's so eloquently put and brimming with political weight.

'Storm in a teacup' row says it all about small-minded Britons

I was talking to a colleague yesterday about the Wossy/Wussy furore currently besieging the BBC. He called it a "storm in a teacup." I agreed, and today saw this Peter Tatchell article on the Guardian Unlimited website today which pretty much sums up the whole ridiculous situation.

Westfield opens, thelondonpaper comes along for the ride

I'm going to go all Private Eye for a minute, but with good reason.

Despite widespread condemnation from locals, Westfield, London's largest ever shopping centre opened today to crowds of thousands of eager shoppers. Mayor Boris Johnson cut the read tape at 10.30am and the shopathon commenced, leaving Bushites (Shepherds Bush locals, not supporters of the American president) looking on with concern at the future of the area.

thelondonpaper has been at the forefront of reporting progress of the centre and, it appears with good reason. Articles such as 'The ultimate shopping experience at Westfield' seemed a little biased. A couple of vox-pop-based articles early this week hinted at balance, although it seemed a bit forced and now all is revealed why.

Todays front page reads something more like a Westfield press release. The Australian retail groups logo is splashed across it with 'OPEN TODAY!' underneath. Hmmm....Skip to the back page and guess what you have...yep, a full page Westfield London ad.

Now, I'm not naive enough to think editors and publishers aren't involved in this kind of cash-for-promotion, and as a News International paper this kind of contention is even more common-place, but it does seem a bit rich that a paper that has the balls to claim it is The London Paper should at least aim to highlight both sides of the argument, particularly the Londoner's side.

Summer at the MCC

A conversation in a subbing class today got me thinking about my time working at Lords over summer today.

The conversation in question revolved around the deliberate use of the word 'coloured' to described a black guy in the Wisden Cricketer Magazine which was spotted by one of my eagle-eyed colleagues. I haven't got the mag to hand so I can't quote it verbatim but essentially the writer was clearly under the impression that 'coloured' is still in use. What's worse is he was trying to be understanding.

Anyways, the talk of that stuck-in-the-dying-days-of-the-empire attitude got me thinking about when I was working in the famous Long Room Bar at Lords between June and September, where every day I could eavesdrop of conversations which I have a feeling in any other situation could make things a little uncomfortable.

I'm not going to go in to it to far but let’s just say whilst I was there I was told "a disgrace who must have been found hanging around outside St Johns Wood tube station", and often had to ask few old plodders not to use the N-bomb, to scoffs of liberal-hating derision.

That's not to say they were all awful - far from it. Loads of them were absolutely lovely and would often stop for a chat about an obscure cricketer or England's latest failure. However, as the only permanent male on a team of about seven girls, I was rarely got cash reward to my services unless I pulled the sob story about being paid £5.95 an hour by the management (true statistic).

To continue this mini-expose, and in the interests of fairness, I can reveal the England squad were a great bunch of people...mostly. Alastair Cook, Ian Bell, Monty and most of the rest were charming, and it turns out the seemingly hot-headed Jimmy Anderson is one of the shyest people I've ever met. However, it is also true that senior members of that team (revealing no names) could not have treated the MCC staff with more contempt if they'd just been on an See You Next Time day course.

I could go on, and I probably will, bit by bit, but in true MCC Member style I'll leave you this with an anecdote: On 5 May 2008, the day after Boris Johnson unseated Ken Livingstone to become Mayor of London I was doing a day-shift which would end up as about a 15-hour slog-a-thon. At 11am every day the bar would start serving alcohol and normally you'd have a few early-birds grabbing a quick ale but no real drinking would take place until at least lunch. However, being a pretty conservative sort of place, the Long Room was pretty much dripping in aging, white-haired excitement at the mayoral result.

Mike, a member who called himself "an entrepreneur from the Wirral" and had been working on Johnson's campaign, had brought all of his friends to celebrate. To cut a lot of drinking and belly-laughing short, the end of the game (I think it was a Middlesex County game) came and this group hadn't watched a second of it. As the players walked back through the Long Room, Mike and his friends went mad and started jumping around in a weird collective heap singing "Ho Ho Ho, here comes Bo-Jo! Out with Ken! Bo-Jo! Bo-Jo Bo-Jo!" over and over. As they fell over and one began vomiting I've never felt so weirdly out of place.

Apparently all you need to turn the MCC in to a Wetherspoons Friday night is conservative election win. If Cameron wins next year’s election, the Long Room had better stock up on WKD.

Food tastes better when it's free

It's been said many times and yet it's still true.

Biggup the o2 Arena crew for one of my cheapest nights out ever. £4 to travel from Westbourne Park to North Greenwich, see Dr John and eat a Brazilian buffet. Food truly does taste better when your pocket doesn't take the brunt.

Dr John was most definitely worth the money. Only mo'fo I've ever seen who can pull off a bright pink blazer and still look cool.

Everyone's a commentator, no-one's got a brain

Interactivity is, all in all, one of best things to come from the internet. The Q&A format net journalism and blogging now partakes in is a great idea. Everybody wants a say, especially if the guy on the net is talking crazy and you want to let him know - he'll get his...Now we can, straight to the heart of the matter, to the author!

Unfortunately, this is the idea and not the reality. Giving voice to voiceless is going badly wrong, post by post. "R U f*@King CRAZY? I HaTe hR" states one moron. "naw idiot thats not tru u bitch" comes the reply. Sound like a YouTube argument over Avril Lavigne? Most likely it’s your local online newspaper forum.

The idea of an intelligent space for debate is disappearing. The space for idiocy is quickly overtaking it like a stolen Mondeo driven by Camden's finest young drunkards - shaky and illiterate but fast as hell. To put it another way, Rupert Murdoch called this comment space "the final stage of democracy." If that's true, let's storm No. 10, send Gordon Brown to exile in Scotland and create a dictatorship.

A friend of mine has come up with a novel solution.

a) Log on to any space with the comment feature.
b) Identify what I will call the "stupid space".
c) Inflame the situation with an absolutely ridiculous loaded statement and watch the fireworks fly. "BASTARD"; "evil doer, jesus will kill youuuu"; "Screw you, man!"
d) Check back in once every few days and keep fanning the flames with more and more outlandish statements.
e) You can adapt this in to a game and keep a tally of how many days it takes the illiterati to realise they're being had. First to be caught loses and is forced to read comment pages for a week.

Let's all get stupid together.

Mighty Boosh may sue Sugar Puffs over stolen crimp ad

Archived from Monday, 14 April 2008

According to Gordon Smart at The Sun, Honey Monster Foods and advertising company Bray Leino find themselves in a sticky situation after being accused of ripping off the 'crimping' rap style seen in the Noel Fielding and Julian Barratt-written BBC comedy The Mighty Boosh.

Fans of the show - myself included - immediately noted the similarities and soon a friend of the Boosh team who had seen the ad informed Fielding and Barratt soon after.

Smart says the Boosh boys are preparing a legal team who will seek to have the ad pulled from air whilst Honey Monster Foods and Bray Leino (named after a horse who looks like US TV presenter Jay Leno...hmmm) have refused to comment.

Check out the ad here and compare it with the Boosh's crimp. Looks like Sugar Puffs have more than a bit of a problem here. And the moral is, children, if you wish to associate your boring breakfast product with an irreverent Pythonesque comedy make sure you ask their permission. Or, even better, pay them to appear: "Hi, I'm Noel Fielding. Sugar Puffs are part of a healthy and nutritious diet. Ignore the name and sugar content and your children's teeth will be stronger after eating! Let's crimp!"

UPDATE: The Mighty Boosh stageshow now includes a piece where the Honey Monster is decapitated by Boosh lead antagonist Tony Harrison, who then assaults the head shouting: "Take it! Take it like you take other people's ideas, you plagaristic c*nt!"